Put a Bug in Your Ear
I tried it and I didn’t care for it.
Fortunately, I was not alone, quite. Wife was just leaving for work at dark-thirty. I had been out on the back porch adoring the grand-pup who is officially boarding here while her family is traveling (vs the prior unofficial boarding overnight on our back porch more nights than not for the past few months.)
The yellow porch light draws fewer insects than a white light, but it only took one: a very tiny moth, enthralled by the lure of the bulb. Its erratic bumbling flight path took it just exactly into the waxy depth of my ear canal.
And thus contained inside my head it was not able in the tight confines of this dark orifice to create enough thrust to gain lift-off but only to propel itself deeper still towards my brain with unimaginably loud flappings and thrashings of its eagle-sized wings. Or so it seemed. And no head-shaking or banging with the palm, no amount of leaping or twirling would serve to do anything other than stir the lepidopt to even more panicked flailings.
The options loomed black before me. Do nothing: Leave the creature alone to flap until it died or succumbed to exhaustion; or Do Something: risk pushing it back even farther toward the eardrum with a pair of eyebrow tweezers–the only available tool suitable for this purpose in trembling hands in the poor light of the bathroom where the procedure took place with far too much emphasis for my comfort on speed–on getting the job done quickly so wife could drive off to work.
I am happy to report that things came out okay. Except for the moth.
Let Me Put a Bug in your Ear – Damn Interesting
Foreign object in the ear: First aid – Mayo Clinic